Who better to share thoughts on renewal than someone who is a CBO – Chief Balance Officer! Guest blogger MaryAnn Rivers is the owner at Balance Works – and someone who takes renewal and health seriously. She’s also a great friend and an inspiration to many. Enjoy!
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Reflection, introspection, rest, relaxation allow us time to re-energize and gain a fresh outlook. It can be a time of letting go of past doubts and mistakes, while looking to the possibilities of the future. Renewal can also be a chance to learn new things that challenge and stretch us. There is an invaluable positive consequence that is gained as well. When you challenge and stretch yourself you automatically gain confidence.
Confidence is one of the few things in life that we don’t want in moderation. Don’t confuse confidence with arrogance or an over-inflated sense of one’s self worth. Genuine confidence by definition is “the assurance you have in yourself or the abilities you possess“.
Here is a simple 5 step renewal of confidence system you can begin today. Commit to doing these steps regularly and you will see results. In fact, as you build confidence it multiplies and soon you will be doing things you never imagined possible.
Step 1: Determine your “WHY” What will more confidence give you? Confidence is simply a means to the end, so you need to determine the end you desire. If your WHY is compelling enough it will pull you forward. It will keep you going when you hit the wall. If you can’t clearly name your WHY, ask yourself what the downside of a lack of confidence has been. What opportunities have you missed? What disappointments did you experience?
Step 2: Visualize the more confident you. If visualization can cure cancer, create architectural wonders, and help professional athletes reach the pinnacle of their career – it can surely help you be more confident. Close your eyes and picture yourself doing something confidently. What does it look like? What does the tone in your voice sound like? How do you feel about yourself? Get a clear picture in your mind of the confident you doing something you find difficult. Repeat this visualization often, at least daily. When you are facing that situation your mind will already know what to do and HOW to do it confidently.
Step 3: Feed your mind to renew your thoughts. Have you heard the expression “Where the mind goes the man (or woman) follows?” To truly renew yourself begin with your thoughts. Fiercely guard what you allow into your mind. Just like you feed your body nutritious food to build energy and health you can feed your mind “nutritious” thoughts that will renew your very core. There is a theory in nutrition coaching called “crowding out.” This means that instead of telling yourself you will NOT eat a donut and drink coffee every morning you start by first adding 16 oz. of water and having some fruit before the donut. Over time, you replace the donut craving with a desire for water and fruit. Do the same thing with your thoughts by flooding your mind with positives. Those negative thoughts (I call them zappers) will fade away as you ‘crowd them out.’
Renew your thoughts by reading books that discus new concepts, and by authors who inspire you. Write down positive affirmations and thoughts. Post them in your work space and your car. Tape them and listen to them each morning and evening.
Step 4: Focus on your strengths. This is the #1 secret to confidence. Are you a gifted listener who always remembers what is important to others? Were you selling used golf balls to your neighbors before you were ready to start kindergarten? Can you get to the heart of a matter in seconds and simplify even the most confusing conversation with a group? All of these skills are clues to your uniqueness. Using your strengths builds confidence, not doing so zaps it. Renewal may inspire you to find ways to more fully utilize your strengths, talents and abilities.
Not certain what your true strengths are? I highly recommend you take one of the many assessment tools that will identify them. StrengthsFinder is one example. Check it out, here http://strengths.gallup.com/110440/About-StrengthsFinder-2.aspx
Step 5: Start Your Confidence Training Program. Confident people have something in common. They take risks and they view mistakes as opportunities to learn and get one step closer to success, rather than failure. Take on activities that stretch you or even scare you and watch your confidence soar. For inspiration think back to other times in your life when you grew the most. Chances are it was after a period of tough challenge, even a bit of pain or uncertainty that you pushed through. Remember how wonderful it felt when you got to the other side.
Can you speak up in a meeting you normally wouldn’t? Can you attempt a new skill that requires going out on a limb? The bottom line advice here is practice, practice, practice… to become more confident.
Taking these 5 simple steps will set you on a deliberate and exciting journey toward a renewal in confidence and unearthing a more authentic you. As the saying goes, life is not a dress rehearsal. Start building your confidence muscle this week!
~ MaryAnn Rivers
