Skeptics and cynics share some things – both question, both challenge, both share doubt openly. As such, we tend to cast folks that raise objections, challenge our plans or thinking, or ask difficult questions in a negative light. We avoid them. Un-invite them to meetings. Find ways to silence them. Avert eye contact. Roll our eyes. Sigh deeply. Run the other way when we see them coming.
Today, I challenge you to refine your approach. To discern if those that are asking questions are skeptics or cynics. For while both will challenge and question, past that, the similarities wane and diverge in significant ways.
The skeptic:
- Is always ready to doubt or question things
- Is a thinker and a prober – striving for truth and clarity
- Challenges, but is willing to consider
- Holds hope for a better solution
- Can help improve, shape, and mold ideas into better ones
The cynic:
- Operates from a belief that people are motivated by self-interest, refusing to acknowledge any higher level motivations
- Predicts the worst; sees only the downside or problems
- Seeks faults, as opposed to seeking the truth
- Is disinclined to consider other opinions, thoughts or ideas
- Holds little hope that things can improve; seeks validation for a worldview of gloom and doom
- Tears down versus builds up
Skeptics are the ones willing to voice questions others might not. They are willing to change their minds, but only on solid thinking and plans. They may slow us down a bit, but we are the stronger for it. They are explorers – and may see things others ignore. They are willing to wrestle with the tough stuff – even when going with the status quo or the direction of the group may be easier.
Carl Sagan, a notable skeptic, says it this way:
“The truth may be puzzling. It may take some work to grapple with. It may be counterintuitive. It may contradict deeply held prejudices. It may not be consonant with what we desperately want to be true. But our preferences do not determine what’s true.”
Cynics, on the on the hand, can be toxic in large doses. They cannot be won over, for they believe in the worst always. They are disinclined to dialog as that may challenge their own thinking. They derail groups, drain energy and shift the focus into a downward spiral. Their caustic proclamations, which may hold an element of truth, tend to tear down rather than build up.
A clever definition of a cynic comes from this Cynical People website:
“A man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.”
So, perhaps, our ideas, our teams, our organizations should nurture some healthy skepticism – in which hard questions are asked, difficult topics are wrestled with and we are okay with alternative views, ideas and perspectives. With the underlying notion that this exploration and examination moves us forward in a better way – and that better ways are possible. As such, cynics need not be invited.
