Transformation from the Inside Out

My yoga instructor calls it “monkey brain” – the tendency we have to jump from thought to thought like a monkey jumps from tree to tree. Human brains have countless thoughts, random thoughts, recurring thoughts – like an 8 lane highway, but with not many traffic rules.

Brain scientists study the phenomenon with much more precision and are finding that there is much more going on than even we can imagine. Estimates vary, but current research would tell us that only 10 to 20% of our brain activity is with conscious thought. The unconscious mind is always working, just below the surface. It exerts a powerful force that shapes what we do, how we do it and consequently the results we get.

Henry Ford is quoted as saying, “If you think you can do a thing or think you can’t do a thing, you’re right.” While I would concur, the challenge becomes how does one dig deeply enough into our sub-conscious thinking to truly understand what guides us from day to day.

Real change, lasting change, substantial change occurs when we are able to identify a thought and belief that is no longer serving us well and replace it with a thought or belief that does. This is transformational change, inside – out, and is much more powerful and more lasting. It requires more up front effort in discerning the thought pattern that needs to change – but once the “aha” happens, requires far less discipline, maintenance and is less prone to regressing back to past behaviors and results.

Here is a simple process that can get you started:

• Think about a situation that you would like to change, where you are frustrated with the results (or the lack of) results you are getting
• Write down your thoughts and beliefs about the situation – with brutal honesty
• Examine them and ask:
  • Are they really true?
  • Do they serve me well?
  • Are there other ways I can think about this situation that would serve me better?
  • Set an intention. Write down the new thoughts or beliefs and describe how you will think and act in accordance to what you have learned.
  • Observe yourself in the next few weeks and when your old thought pattern shows up; guide your thoughts back to your intention. Take corrective action.
  • Repeat. Over and over and over again. Our subconscious so powerful that this make take awhile.

Examples always help me, so here is a simple one.

Situation:  You are frustrated and overworked.  The team you lead waltzes out the office door at 5 every day, leaving you to work late nights and Saturdays.

Beliefs: After sitting down to reflect, you realize that you have a belief that the work won’t get done right if you don’t do it yourself.

Examination:  When you think through the questions, you realize that the work may not get done exactly the same way you would do it, but that there can be many ways to tackle the work. What matters is the result.  You realize that you “hold onto the work” – and that is resulting in your frustration and a severe crimp in your work life balance. Clearly this belief is not serving you well.

Intention:  You set an intention to delegate work to your staff.  You intend to allow your team the freedom to approach the task in their unique way, knowing that the focus on the right result will suffice. You see yourself coaching your team as you delegate. You set an intention to leave the office every day by 6 pm.

Actions:  In the office, you identify some recurring tasks that you could delegate. You identify team members who are good fits for the work, set expectations around outcomes and expectations on the results and coach them through the first few weeks. You slip a few times and switch into “micro-manage” mode, but recognize it,  apologize to the person and ask them to tell you when you are providing too much direction in “how” to do the task rather than focusing on the outcome.

Of course, it sounds easier that it actually is. But the alternative of continuing to live with thought patterns and sub-conscious beliefs that undermine our happiness, success and well being makes the effort, time and focus well worth it.

This quote sums it up quite nicely:

Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.